The Reality of Financial Stress in Defence Life

Military families are often seen as financially secure – but that’s not always the case. Defence life comes with its own set of financial challenges: the cost of moving every few years, the struggle of finding stable work as a Defence partner, childcare costs, and unexpected expenses that seem to appear at the worst possible time. Add in the rising cost of living, and it’s no surprise that many Defence parents feel stretched thin.

Financial stress isn’t just about numbers – it’s about the mental load of constantly managing budgets, planning for the unknown, and feeling like you’re always one unexpected expense away from struggle mode. It’s tough. But there are ways to create stability, even in an unpredictable lifestyle.


How to Manage Financial Stress as a Defence Parent

1. Take Advantage of Defence Support Services

There are resources available specifically for Defence families, but many people either don’t know about them or hesitate to ask for help. Some options include:

  • Defence Member and Family Support (DMFS) – Offers financial assistance and counselling.
  • The King’s Trust Australia – Provides business and career support for Defence partners.
  • Defence Housing Assistance – Helps with housing costs and rent in high-cost areas.
  • Local Family Support Organisations – Many Defence communities have grants, food banks, or emergency relief funds available.

If financial stress is weighing on you, use these resources. They exist for a reason.


2. Get Clear on Your Budget (Without the Overwhelm)

Budgeting doesn’t have to mean spreadsheets and strict rules. A simple system – knowing what’s coming in, what’s going out, and where you can adjust – can help relieve some of the stress. If budgeting feels overwhelming, start small:

  • Look at the past three months of spending. What patterns stand out?
  • Identify one area to cut back on without feeling deprived.
  • Set up an emergency fund – even if it’s just $10 a week.

The goal isn’t perfection. It’s progress.


3. Find Flexible Work That Moves With You

One of the biggest financial stressors for Defence families is the difficulty of finding stable employment as a Defence partner. If traditional jobs aren’t working, consider:

  • Remote work or freelancing
  • Starting a portable business
  • Looking into Defence-friendly employers

More Defence partners are turning to self-employment or side businesses because it offers stability, flexibility, and control – things traditional employment doesn’t always allow in this lifestyle.


4. Plan for the “Surprise” Expenses

Defence life is full of unexpected costs – last-minute relocations, car repairs (especially at posting time – when cars are transported there can often be damages, and many insurance companies don’t cover the vehicle during transit), school fees, whole new uniform runs, and those annoying little expenses that add up fast. Setting aside even a small buffer can make a huge difference when these pop up.

  • If you get deployment pay or allowances, put a portion aside for unexpected expenses.
  • Separate savings accounts for things like car maintenance, kids’ activities, or medical costs.
  • If saving feels impossible, start small. Even an extra $50 can ease stress when something unexpected happens.

5. Cut Costs Without Feeling Deprived

Saving money doesn’t have to mean going without. Look for easy swaps that reduce costs while keeping life enjoyable:

  • Groceries – Plan simple meals, buy in bulk, and shop specials. Aldi and local markets can make a big difference.
  • Utilities – Check if you’re eligible for rebates or discounts.
  • Kids’ Activities – Look for Defence discounts or community-run programs instead of private ones.
  • Fuel Costs – When your partner is away, put that saved petrol money toward self-care or savings.

6. Talk About Money Without Shame

Financial stress can feel isolating, but you’re not alone. Many Defence families struggle with the same challenges. Have open conversations with your partner about money – without guilt or blame. If things feel overwhelming, financial counselling (through DMFS or local organisations) can help ease the burden.


You’re Not Alone, And There’s Always a Way Forward

Financial stress as a Defence parent is real. The cost of living keeps rising, work can be unpredictable, and the mental load of “just making it work” is exhausting. But there are tools, resources, and small shifts that can make a difference.

This lifestyle is already demanding – money stress shouldn’t make it harder (and I know wholeheartedly that it can, and does). Take it one step at a time, ask for help when you need it, and remember: you’re doing the best you can with what you have.